Fits Of Laughter
by mladyhobbit
Summary: George Weasley is having a bad day thanks to Draco Malfoy. Betaed by DeepShadows2. Added Snape just for her cause he's cuddly. No slash, sorry guys. Mention of a broomstick up... well you get the picture. R&R please.


Fits of Laughter

Characters: GW/FW/OW/HP/DM/RW/SS

Rating: PG-13 for language

Warning/disclaimer: I do not own any of these characters, Mrs. Rowling does. This fic is a bit silly...you have been warned. Comments are welcome, just not bad ones. Thankee!

Description: George Weasley is having a bad day no thanks to Draco Malfoy

Gryffindor had just won the Quidditch match against Slytherin again for the 5th time this year. Cheers echoed through the winner's locker room. Their captain, Oliver Wood, smiled triumphantly as he headed to the showers for some much needed relaxation. Harry Potter had managed to catch the Snitch once again, and this time he didn't get hurt at all. The only thing that did get hurt this time was Draco Malfoy's pride.

Harry and Fred were sitting on one of the many long, wooden benches boasting about the game and drinking some water when their conversation was quickly interrupted. George Weasley burst into the room holding his bum with both his hands, dancing around frantically. Fred and Harry broke out into uncontrolled laughter until their eyes were watery and their stomachs hurt, barely keeping on the bench.

"Shut up, you lot! I've...got...to...go...now!" bellowed George hastily as he sprinted towards his destination, only to find it out of order. He shouted and slammed hi fist against the shower door. Oliver came out with a burgundy towel around his muscled, yet firm waist.

"Oi! George ye be 'eedin to calm down a bit. No more ce'brating 'til we get 'ack to the common room. 'ow whut seems to be the 'roblem?" Oliver questioned seeing George's discontent. George whimpered at him, sticking out his bottom lip. An answer was heard, but it wasn't from him, rather outside the door.

'Soddy Weasley's, can't even play a game of Quidditch without cheating. What you did was low Weaselbee. My father will know about this!" said none other than Draco _"I'm-better-than-anybody-else"_ Malfoy.

"Shut your mouth, Malfoy, you're just upset 'cause we won and you know it," snapped Harry.

"Of course I'm upset. That filthy weasel hit me with the Bludger on purpose! He made me fall to the ground in a massive heap of fire. It was so dreadful, I almost died!" sobbed Malfoy falsely, as George raced toward him. Draco held out his wand and said, _"Engorgio!"_ causing George to wince in severe pain and begin to cry out for mercy.

Ron burst into the room "Malfoy knock it off! Its not..." he was stopped in mid-sentence by his brother's cry of pain. Suddenly a Bludger bat shoved out from his rear.

"Bloody hell, is that? It is! Blimey, George, you have a Bludger bat sticking out of your arse!" snickered Ron. Draco burst into a fit of laughter; however nobody else seemed to find it funny except for him and Ron. George continued to whimper and shriek as the Bludger bat finally grew to its normal size. "I'm 'ot pulling that out!" said Oliver with his mouth twisted in disgust. George was leaned over the sink, tears pouring from his eyes as he sobbed in pain.

"Somebody get a professor!" cried Fred dramatically. Draco had managed to slip out of the room. George leaned their crying for a moment. Ron giggled like a school girl "Oi George! You've got something sticking out your arse!" His older brother glared at him "You best hope that I don't stick a broom stick up yours Ronald!" Draco soon came back with any Gryffindor's worst nightmare...Professor Snape.

"Mister Malfoy, what seems to be the..." he paused as he looked down, his eyes widened.

"Fifty points from Grffindor for inappropriate use of Quidditch property!" Professor Snape snarled. Draco chuckled heartily.

"Twenty five points from Slytherin for being a tattle-tale." Snape declared- he looked at Oliver with questioning eyes "Twenty points from Gryffindor for being half nude in front of a teacher!" Snape looked directly at Wood. Harry chuckled as Draco got in trouble, but his face soon hardened as Snape barked at his captain.

"Anyway, you can fix him, Professor? Is he going to die? George! You're going to die! How will I ever live with you? How will Weasley Wizard Wheezes ever run with just me? I'm not going to have Ron help. Take me with you George!" Fred spoke as though the world was coming to an end. Snape pushed him out of the way. "Out of my way, Weasley! I shall have a look at this." He bent down a bit, wondering how this happened- George Weasley, with a Bludger bat stuck up his arse. He chuckled to himself. "Well done, Mister Malfoy! Ten points to Slytherin for making a Gryffindor miserable."

The two Weasley's, Harry Potter, and Oliver Wood's faces were all bright red. Finally Oliver grabbed Draco by his throat, slamming him into a locker. He pointed his wand at him, warning, "Say the counter-spell now, Malfoy! If not, I wonder if you'd like to be the amazing, bouncing ferret again?" Draco whimpered under the seventh year's grip.

"Never!"

Oliver couldn't control his anger and with a loud poof his enemy was turned once again into a white ferret. As Oliver backed away, dropping the ferret-Draco, his towel fell from his waist. Ron, paying attention to Draco, had his face light up. "Ha! Ha! Ha! I would have never imagined that I'd ever see the soddy git like that again." The ferret came up and bit Ron on his leg. "Prat" mumbled Ron, kicking the ferret off, annoyed. Oliver ran quickly back to the shower, grabbing his clothes and dressing.

Harry spoke up "I'm taking him to the hospital wing, maybe Madam Pomfrey can help?"

George shook his head 'no', an image of everyone seeing him in his predicament flashing in his head, but soon he found himself being dragged away by the others. Snape, meanwhile, ended up carrying ferret-Draco, as the little bugger seemed to have gotten the idea he could sneak into the girls' Quidditch changing room in his current state. When they finally got to the hospital wing, Madam Pomfrey was upset, yelling at each of them. this included Snape, who also gained a whack on the head from a bed pan. He mumbled something angrily, like he liked to do, and stalked away Snape-like. Before long both of them were back to the same they were before the match.

Two weeks passed and while everything had stayed as normal as a wizarding school in Britain could be Ron still snickered when he saw Draco in the Great Hall. Harry nudged Ron in the stomach, "You still haven't gotten over that, have you Ron? Best not dwell on it any longer." Ron sat there like he was king of the world as his friend shook his head. Fred, George, and Oliver were sitting beside them talking about new Quidditch plays and moves. Neither groups brought up the thing from two weeks ago again, though the Weasleys had become fond of meeping like ferrets whenever they passes Malfoy.

The End.


End file.
